Good Bye 👋

With heavy heart and tears in my eyes. I write this and this is my last post on here ever. I am leaving this blog just as a reminder of my teenage years  and my early twenties.

The seeker sought but what she sought was beyond her reach.
The seeker has been on this journey for a decade less 4 years
The seeker is done moving around in circles. What is being sought is beyond the seeker’s reach.
Maybe what is being sought might become available to the seeker in her lifetime

🌸🌸The end🌸🌸
Mariam A.🧕🏿


The Wait II


Here is a reply i got from the previous post .

Salam alaykum ukhti, feeling such a sad vibe from this, hope you are doing well! 🙂QadarAllah! we plan so much but the best of planners is Allah! Sabr is the key to success, I’ve reach far early in life (23 with education, 2 kids, husband) it is hard work, and keeping up with Quran and all this is a struggle! Right now I wish I had a lot of time so that I could attend dorous and Quran classes, and maybe just sit down with my husband without feeling guilty because I have 100 things to do!

There is definitely a wisdom behind why you aren’t where you want to be, just remember, you are EXACTLY where Allah wants you to be, now go make the best out of it! maybe when you are finally able to cross some of the points of your list, you are more mature and ready to do your best! what you aspire for might not be the best for you at this point.
Nuh gave dawah for 950 years, he had 1 goal on his list, to make people worship Allah, after 950 years of hard work and plenty of du’a he still haven’t reach his 1 goal, and never really did! even though Allah did not grand him his goal in this dunya, his efforts was not wasted and he was still one of the most successful people who have ever lived, why? because of his sabr and trust in Allah subhana huwa ta’ala ❤ you probably know all this but we all need a reminder now and then, hope it brighten your mood ❤

I cried while reading it(i have been feeling numb with no emotions lately). I actually ran away from God(I still pray btw). The Quran has been on the back burner too.

So why are you telling us this you hypocrite?

The purpose of this blog for me has always been the Quran. My writing this here too also has to do with the Quran. Let me explain!

I have tried to fill the emptiness and sadness with food, buying things(amazon, sephora, iherb, jolse etc), watching movies, avoiding muslim facebook, listening to music, exploring instagram, reading and watching useless (v)/blogs i would have never imagined myself doing and some other activities. I have been doing all of these for the past three months and i have never felt more horrible(if there is a word like this) in my entire life.

The Quran is healing

The Quran is mercy

The Quran is a reminder

The Quran is a guiding friend

The Quran is true and it is the word of God.

I guess as my Blog name clearly states, I will continue to seek the Quran.

If you are ever in a rut, please read this post.





The Wait


In the name of God to whom belongs unending praises and thanks.

I have always waited all my life for everything that most people get at each stage of their life. Some i get and some i don’t end up getting. Even though i have given up on most or better put; stop working towards them. I am just struggling to stay alive.

examples of things that i had to wait for

  • Starting University- I waited for over a year
  • Getting my first job as a student- two years
  • Getting a good paying/stable job after university- Still waiting
  • Getting a man- I waited till after University  *
  • Getting my drivers license/car- I waited for over a year
  • Getting Pregnant- Still waiting
  • Getting to be a companion of the Quran- Still waiting
  • Death- Still waiting

*I am still not sure how much i wanted this.

The. End.


The Message of the Quran 

Indeed, I believe there is not a single passage in the Quran which doesn’t have a personal message for you, only you have to have the insight to look for it. Every attribute of God asks you to build a corresponding relationship with Him, every description of the Life beyond death asks you to prepare for it, or aspire for its reward or seek protection from it evils, every dialogue involves you in it and every character presents a model you should either emulate or avoid following. Every legal injunction, even if it is apparently inapplicable in your present situation, has some message for you. Very general statements always have a specific meaning for you; very specific statements, events and situations can always lead to general propositions to apply to your lives.
-Khurram Murad, Way to the Quran pg. 90-91

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Tajweed Thoughts

We all have been stuck in that awkward moment when we need to write something down, but can’t find a pencil or piece of paper. So, we find ourselves scribbling with crayons on the back of an envelope, or a random flyer. Sometimes, Tajweed notes suffer the same fate. They are written on a random piece of paper (with the intention of them being transferred later), or on a notes app on a smartphone.

Although the crisis is averted in the moment, unfortunately, it doesn’t facilitate mastery of the Tajweed Rules. One of the first things my Sheikh told me was that I was required to have a notebook dedicated to the rules he would cover in class. I still have this notebook, and till this day, I write down any new Tajweed rules I learn in the same notebook.

Organizing Your Tajweed Notebook

You can buy a simple spiral notebook, or a journal. Some students even use loose leaf paper that is filed in a binder. You can take notes in the order that you learn them in class, or you can create sections, and write your new notes in the appropriate section. Here is a suggested list of sections you might need:






You can use tabs to separate the various sections, or just fold the first page before a new section begins. You can also buy a multi subject notebook. Make sure to keep this notebook with your mushaf and have it with you at every class.

Benefits of a Tajweed Notebook

Having a notebook dedicated to Tajweed notes helps to know which rules you have covered and which you still need to learn. Also, it serves as a quick reference point for when you are trying to remember a specific rule. Lastly but most importantly, it allows you to easily review the rules you have learned in your previous lesson.

Remembering Tajweed Rules

In all the years that I have been teaching Tajweed, I have had only two students who always answer my questions about Tajweed rules correctly. Both of these students use the same study technique. Just as they set time aside to practice the recitation lesson for the next class, they also set aside dedicated time to memorize whatever rules were covered in the previous session. Overtime, they have memorized all the rules I have ever covered with them. Also, while preparing their recitation lesson, they identify examples of the rules we have already covered. This helps to solidify their understanding of the material, but also makes it easier for them to answer the teacher’s questions.

Your Tajweed Notebook is an essential part of your journey. For students who hope to get ijazah, it is indispensable, as mastery of the rules is just as much a requirement for ijazah as mastery in recitation.

I pray this post helps all of us to get our Tajweed Notebooks organized :).


Late Night Thoughts

Bismillah Walhamdulillah Wassalatu Wassalamu ala Rasulillah,

I was just recently thinking about owning my own house. I imagined how I was going to decorate it, make my own gym, have a garden in the summer, host parties and all the other fun stuffs that comes with owning a house . Then I remembered my real home, the one my rabb(my master) has promised me. The one which he has promised me so many times in the Quran.The one he describes as

“Is the description of Paradise, which the righteous are promised, wherein are rivers of water unaltered, rivers of milk the taste of which never changes, rivers of wine delicious to those who drink, and rivers of purified honey, in which they will have from all [kinds of] fruits and forgiveness from their Lord” (Surah 47:15)

The only requirement for this home is to be from the muttaqeen(those who are conscious/mindful of Allah)I don’t need to worry about mortgages, paying any bills, maintenance and all the other things that come with owning a house. All I need to do is move into my house.

I ask that Allah makes us all from the people who are conscious of him and of those who inherit the highest level of his paradise.




Attention Quran Students

Knowledge isn’t sought when you’re free and have nothing else to do; knowledge is sought by freeing yourself for it and giving it a high priority every single day of your life.

Memorization of the Qurān does not happen in a day; you go through the 4 steps every single day of your life once you embark on this journey: